You’re full of good intentions. You want to do the right thing in the New Year. New year, new you. Nothing wrong with that. So far so good.
So why don’t New Year’s resolutions work?
Most of us give up on our resolutions within one to six weeks of starting, and many of these resolutions you repeat year after year.
So, despite our best intentions, why is it so difficult to stick to resolutions? It doesn't matter if the resolution is to start a new habit or to give up an addiction; it all comes down to consistency and dedication.
Most people blame their failure to fulfil resolutions on a lack of time, resources, or motivation, or a loss of zeal after starting. Only about 16% of people are able to follow their resolutions, according to research. The majority give up within one to six weeks of starting.
Here are the most common reasons why most New Year resolutions don't stick:
You set unrealistic resolutions
A resolution is about what you would like to do rather than what you 'should' do. People either establish excessively difficult objectives that quickly become unreachable, or they set relatively easy goals that they quickly become bored with. It's critical to review your resolutions to see if they're achievable. Are they quantifiable? Are they constrained by time? Are they specific in nature? Are they in line with your goals? Is it possible to break them down into smaller chunks? Is it possible to achieve them within the time frame you've set? Remember that in order to keep a resolve, you must change your behaviour, so make sure your goals are reasonable.
Lack of accountability
Working with someone - like a Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist, an accountability partner if you will, guarantees that the proper energy and drive are there to help you be more, accomplish more, and have more. This helps you follow a sequence of steps. So working together you’re more likely to achieve your goals.
Also, think about who you gather around you as your ‘team’. Avoid people who sap your energy. Make sure you work with people who elevate and encourage you, especially when you're feeling down.
No tracking/review
A weekly or fortnightly review allows you to keep track of your progress and turn excuses into opportunities. What gets measured gets done, and what gets done can be improved and made a habit with the help of a good tracking system. Many of the apparent barriers are based on assumptions, inferences, judgments, overthinking, and previous points of reference. A track record of accomplishments aids in the development of resolution consistency.
Lack of planning
Great planning is always needed for a good implementation, and it’s more realistic if you plan the action steps around the resolution, break them down into smaller pieces, and schedule them on the calendar.
Weekly targets and plans that are bite-sized create a sense of accomplishment rather than "Oh, I have an entire year to myself, I can always restart next month when I have more time." That’s bad self-talk. Delaying tactics.
Self-doubt
Don't allow your past failures to dictate your future. After you've learned from your failures, it's time to get to work. Every tiny victory should be celebrated because it motivates you to work harder for the larger ones. Being self-critical, or doubtful, doesn't help since it focuses all of your attention and energy on "why I can't do this?" As you improve, celebrate all your wins.
Unclear as to why
Most people fail to achieve their objectives because their 'why' is unclear. The 'why' is what motivates you to take action and achieve goals. You may know what you want, but you won't be able to figure out how to get it unless you know why you want it.
So, why are you making these resolutions? What motivates you to achieve these objectives? What motivates you to do what you do? What emotional connection does your 'why' have? All excuses go away when the purpose is strong.
What can be done about this? Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Hypnosis - Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy
My skillset lies in taking away the meaning you’ve added to things. I use Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Hypnosis. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is the technique we use to find out how you’re thinking feeling and acting. Hypnosis is how we work together to land the message and you easily remember it.
For example, when you say any of the following to yourself:
| “I can’t lose weight”. | Of course you can. Don't think of it as 'losing'. Just not being so bothered by food. Let's stop the stress, anxiety and comfort eating. |
| “My self-esteem is through the floor”. | Let’s big you up. Take the meaning of things. Look at what you’ve chosen to tell yourself and change it - for the better. |
| “I want to get fitter”. | I’ll help you visualise it. See yourself running faster. Breaking up with the bed on a cold winter’s morning and getting out there and pounding the streets - regardless the weather. |
| “I need to quit smoking”. | We start by accepting that smoking doesn’t relax you. Nicotine is a stimulant. Learn how to relax, so you don’t feel the need to light up when you’re bored or stressed. |
What exactly is hypnosis?
Hypnosis comes from the Greek word for sleep. And it’s not helpful. During hypnosis, you’re not asleep. You’re just in a deeply relaxed state. That’s all. It simply means you’re more receptive to my words. It’s called suggestibility. A better way of describing what’s happening to you is to say that you’re focussing your attention over and above what you normally would. That way it makes it easier for you to act on my words and change your behaviour for the better.
What is Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy?
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is a talking therapy. And basically, it’s looking at how you’re thinking, feeling and acting. Then focusing on where you’re ‘out of sorts’ and getting you back on track to being a better version of yourself. Calmer and more resilient.
And the best way to land this message deep inside you is using hypnosis, hence the name Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy.
Who am I?
I’m James Thomas a Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist. I’ve used hypnosis thousands of times to deal with clients’ stresses, anxieties, drug addiction, alcohol abuse, PTSD, overeating, low self-esteem, eczema, anger, to name but a few.
I cover all of Lincolnshire with my rooms in Louth and Lincoln.
And don’t wait for the New Year. Change now. Get in touch with me at jamesthomas@thegentlemind.co.uk or call 07787563099.
